Anxiety and Panic


I never truly thought that this blog would become that interesting until we are actually overseas. Yet, I had hoped to relay the experience of what it’s like to prepare to leave your home country, the anxiety and panic, and all the little details that one must attend to in order to make this a reality.


So far I think I’ve done a miserable job of relaying my anxieties, and today’s post is meant to rectify that somewhat. I tend to handle stress a lot better than most people, and can generally stay calm when most would be going “Ape Shit”.

Inside though, tension and stress is building, and I’m really feeling the pressure.

For instance, I started writing this post today because I could not sleep. I woke up thinking about my to-do list because it seems to be growing more than shrinking.

Anxiety and Panic Before Bliss?

Here’s a list of tasks that I MUST complete before I can move.

  • Repair some body damage on my car so I can sell it.
  • Update my car’s (expired) registration and title.
  • Upload to Dropbox digital copies of everything paper or electronic that I wish to keep.
  • Spend a moment with everyone I care about in Portland, and attempt to accommodate those who request it.
  • Purchase another backpack.
  • Swap out my video equipment (Canon Vixia for GoPro).
  • Apply for Visas.
  • Deal with banking and postal mail.

Our work schedules are full, and we’ve been spending a TON of time building out JohnnyFit Online.

We have high hopes and confidence that the site can become more profitable very soon. We increased our membership by 33% last month, and we’re actually hoping that it becomes our main source of income before we leave for Bangkok in late January.

We’ve finally given notice to vacate our apartment, and plan on spending the entire month of December couch surfing. This will force us to get rid of all of our things by the end of November.

Today is November 1st. We’ll need to spend the time to make nice ads for Craigslist if we’re to get a decent price for our things. One fear is that we’ll have to practically give everything away in order to be relieved of it. Since a big part of our budget is based upon the sale of our possessions, obviously we want to take the time to photograph everything, and make nice ads. I know from experience that this can be very time consuming.

We All Need Time and Money!

It is time and money that mainly affects my ability to complete our to-do list. Two things that are generally stressful to people regardless of the situation.

There is so much to do before I will be standing on that Thai beach wondering to myself how I made this happen. But dammit if it doesn’t feel like my heart is in my throat and I’m choking on it…

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